Secret Baby for the Soldier Bear Page 5

  Her face was serious as she looked down at him, her back stiff, but then she smiled. “Yeah, we were.” Emersyn’s cheeks reddened, indicating she remembered some of those good times.

  “And now here we are. No point in making ourselves suffer, right?” He tightened his grip on her waist, drawing her closer. Even with all their clothes on and a house full of people, Gabe could feel that pull. She was intoxicating; he couldn’t resist her if he tried. “We couldn’t expect things to work out while we were both still enlisted. Things were messy, and there was too much to deal with. But now…” Their lips were so close, he could feel the heat radiating from her body.

  “Things were messy,” she agreed as she pulled back, breaking his embrace. “You fucking left, Gabe.”

  Heat washed over his temples, but it was no longer the heat of desire. It was the hot panic of anxiety as she pulled away from him, an unexpected side effect that he didn’t enjoy. Gabe remembered having a very familiar feeling when he’d made the decision to leave Emersyn behind and move on to the Delta Force. Something about it had felt incredibly wrong, but the paycheck that dangled within his grasp would go a long way toward making sure his sisters had college tuition without joining the service and his mother wouldn’t have to get a second or third job to put food on the table. He pressed his lips together as he recalled the cavalier way he’d announced his departure. “A lot’s changed since then.”

  “Yes, you’re right.” She turned slightly away from him, her eyes narrowing as she looked out the window. Emersyn pulled in a slow, deep breath. “More than you know, actually. Gabe, you and I have a son.”

  4

  “What did you say?”

  Emersyn’s panther growled, swirling inside her. She hadn’t meant to tell him, or at least not like that. She was no longer in control of her body or anything else, and she hadn’t been from the moment she’d walked into that damn house. At first, she hadn’t even known what was causing it and had written it off as nerves. After all, it’d been a long time since she’d started a new job, and the elite status of everyone else on the Force was certainly something to make her feel self-conscious.

  But no. As soon as Gabe walked into the living room, she’d known it was him.

  She’d spent the last year focusing on Lucas and her career so intently, her panther practically never made its presence known. But it was wild now, demanding answers.

  Demanding Gabe.

  She angrily tamped it back down again. It was unfair enough to feel the fated pull toward someone who’d already shown her he wouldn’t be a reliable mate, but it was even worse to know that despite everything, she still responded to his presence in the same way.

  “We have a son together.” She folded her arms across her chest and refused to look at him. She didn’t want to see the fear and anger that she knew she’d find in his eyes. “I found out I was pregnant after you left, and I was fortunate enough to arrange a discharge for myself. I couldn’t exactly stay in with a child on the way who could turn out to be either a panther or a bear. We all know how that would turn out.”

  “And you didn’t even tell me?” His voice was a harsh whisper.

  Emersyn flicked a hand in the air. “How could I? You’d already made it quite clear that you had bigger plans than sticking around with me, no matter what we felt for each other. The last thing I was going to do was track your sorry ass down just to beg you for child support.”

  “You wouldn’t have… You could’ve… I’d have… Ugh!” His splutterings ended in a cry of frustration. “Emersyn, how could you seriously think that? I would’ve done so many things differently if I knew! And of course I would’ve helped with finances. I’m not a fucking deadbeat. You really think I’d be cool with just leaving you to raise our kid on your own?” He choked out the last words as he launched himself off the exam table and paced the room.

  “It’s easy to say that now. You had big ambitions, Gabe. We both knew that. It’s not as though this really changes anything.”

  “Of course it does!” He stormed to her side of the room and spun her around to face him, his hands gripping her arms. “I can’t believe you would think otherwise. This changes absolutely everything.”

  She shook her head, furious with herself for even saying anything. Emersyn had left Lucas with Melody for the day while she arranged her living situation, but he would be coming to headquarters soon enough. She’d been sure for just a moment that Gabe would know as soon as he saw those sweet little cheeks, but now that she’d opened her big mouth, she wished she’d just kept it shut and taken her chances. “No. Nothing has to change. You can keep living your life the way you want to.”

  “That’s not right,” Gabe growled. His grizzly was enraged, yet he was careful not to grip her too tightly.

  “I don’t need you,” she asserted, pushing her chin into the air. “I’ve been doing just fine on my own, and the last thing I want is for you to come swooping in like you’re some fucking hero, determined to save a day that doesn’t need saving!” Emersyn twisted away from him. Only a few minutes earlier, she’d been tempted to fall right into his arms and relive those old trysts he’d alluded to. Now, she wished she could walk away and never see him again.

  His jaw was tight, his blue eyes glittering. “Whatever you might think, Emersyn, I will be a part of my son’s life. What’s his name? Where is he? I want to meet him.”

  Emersyn sagged against the counter, feeling defeated. She’d messed everything up. She didn’t want to be one of those women that parades men in and out of their children’s lives. There was no doubt in her mind that Gabe would leave again, and that meant she’d put her son in the same position of heartache she’d been living in. She covered her face with her hands and closed her eyes, envisioning her sweet little boy. “His name is Lucas. He’s at my friend’s house for the day, but I’ll be picking him up soon and he’ll be staying here with me.”

  “Good. Let me know as soon as he arrives.” The door whisked open and slammed shut as Gabe left.

  Emersyn clenched her teeth and lifted her head, determined not to cry or show any other sign that he’d gotten to her. After all, she had other patients to see.

  The next morning was even more tense than the initial meeting in the living room. Emersyn had discovered when she’d gone to bed that night that Gabe had chosen the bedroom suite right next to hers. Whether it was on purpose or not, she had no idea, but she hated it all the same. It was bad enough to be under the same roof, but sharing a wall was that much worse. Fortunately, Melody and Lucas had arrived late enough that the baby was already asleep, and that had put off the meeting she was dreading for just a little bit longer.

  She’d hardly slept at all, which made it easy to roll out of bed at six. It was far earlier than it needed to be, considering she’d taken a few days off at the clinic and didn’t have to commute to make the SOS Force meeting, but she figured it decreased her chances of running into Gabe in the kitchen.

  “Holy cow,” she whispered to Lucas, who rubbed his eyes sleepily. “This place is incredible. The Force must have a lot of money backing them.” She took in all the sleek lines of the modern cabinets, the high-end appliances, and the retractable walls that could make this room an outdoor space as well. It was like nothing she’d ever seen before.

  “They certainly do.”

  The voice behind her made her jump. Emersyn pressed her free hand to her chest as she turned to find Melody standing in the doorway, still in her pajamas. “I don’t need any coffee now. I’m awake,” she joked.

  “Sorry about that.” Melody ruffled Lucas’s tuft of dark hair on her way to the coffee pot. “You don’t look like you slept any better than I did. I take it things are still a little strained between you and Gabe?”

  Emersyn had told her friend all the gory details when she’d arrived, and it’d felt so good to have someone she knew and trusted at her side. She made a mental note to thank Leona profusely for setting this up. “I don’t really know, since I
’m doing my best not to talk to him right now. Why didn’t you sleep?”

  “It’s just a new place. I’ve been sleeping on that ratty old mattress and flat pillow for years, simply because I didn’t want to spend the money on something new. I was so comfortable last night that I didn’t know how to handle it.” She reached for another mug. “Want some?”

  “Yes, thank you.” Emersyn settled Lucas into the highchair she’d brought along, which contrasted distinctly with the rest of the kitchen. “What did you mean a minute ago? I said the Force must have a lot of money, and you said they do.”

  “It can’t come as any surprise, really. There are some very prominent people backing this organization. Hudson, for one. A quick search online shows that he’s worth millions, and we know he pumps a lot into the Force.” Melody opened several cabinets. “I might have to start doing some of the grocery shopping myself. I could really use some Pop-Tarts.”

  “And?” Emersyn had known Melody long enough to know there was more to the story than she’d already told.

  “And,” Melody said with a sly smile as she opened a box of doughnuts, “I spent some time talking with Hudson and Garrison. Initially, we were just talking about what my role would be here when it came to taking care of Lucas or any other children who might happen to be here. The conversation turned to what I actually do for a living, and they were much more interested in that. The Force members are a bit busy with their jobs and their missions, and they didn’t have anyone to take care of the books.”

  Emersyn smiled despite her rough night. “Are you telling me you’re part of the Force now, too?”

  Mel lifted a shoulder. “I’d say I’m more like Force-adjacent. I’m certainly not on the same level as the rest of you. I just crunch the numbers in my spare time.”

  “That’s so exciting!” Emersyn wrapped her arms around her friend. “I can’t tell you how happy I am about all this. I’ve been questioning a lot of my decisions lately—both current and past—but having you here is going to be great. I love that I won’t have to worry about Lucas no matter which job I’m working, and he adores you.” Finding some cottage cheese and fruit, she began making breakfast for herself and her son.

  “I adore him, too,” she said in a singsong voice as she tickled his cheek. “And seriously, this house is amazing. There are six adults living here, plus three more staying temporarily, and yet it feels like we’re the only ones. I don’t think I’ve ever been in a place this big.” She pointed a finger at Emersyn. “You better not quit now, because I can’t possibly go back to that dinky apartment.”

  Emersyn laughed, but her joy faded as she thought of the possible reasons she just might leave. “That all depends on how things go with Gabe.”

  “I know. Well, I’m going to grab a shower while I can. Just bring Lucas by when you’re ready.” She polished off her doughnut and carried her coffee mug out of the kitchen.

  A little while later, Emersyn held her shoulders stiff and straight as she walked into the dining room that was now a conference room. The others were filtering in as well, and she made sure she took a seat in between Raul and Jude so that Gabe couldn’t possibly sit next to her. She imagined he wouldn’t want to, considering how angry he’d been the night before, but he did manage to take up the spot directly across from her.

  “Good morning, everyone. For those of you who didn’t get a chance to meet her before, this is Leona.” Hudson gestured to his side. “She’s my mate and a vital part of the D.C. unit.”

  Leona gave a little wave to everyone and a wink to Emersyn.

  “I appreciate how quickly this has all come together,” he continued, “and it’s particularly important since we already have business to take care of here in Los Angeles. As you all know by now, there are great numbers of shifters living in the area. It makes sense, considering how dense the general population is here, anyway. We’ve started a registry system in Dallas to help us keep track of the actual shifter numbers. I suggest we get one up and running for this area as soon as possible, too. It helps not only determine what shifters are where, but who belongs to what clan and which conclave’s jurisdiction. We’re dealing with massive numbers compared to what we’ve had in the past.”

  Jude raised a finger in the air. “I’d be glad to head that up. I’ve done some similar things in the past.”

  “Great,” Hudson said with an appreciative nod. “It could come in handy with the first mission.”

  “We’re looking at an interesting development when it comes to clan activity,” Garrison offered. “Many clans—or prides, or packs, as the case may be—operate pretty independently, as you know. It appears that some of them in this area aren’t just extended family units that live and work together, but actual biker gangs. I don’t want to sound biased against those types of organizations. I know some of them do some very charitable work in the world. But the ones we’re seeing around here are getting violent. They’re fighting with each other over turf, killing each other for status, and then exacting revenge on those who they feel wronged them. This is a problem for human gangs, but I’m sure you can imagine how much more complicated it gets when we start talking about shifters. They’re bigger, stronger, and they have closer family ties and loyalties.”

  Emersyn listened, focusing the entirety of her attention on Garrison and Hudson. This was something completely unlike anything she’d ever done before, and she wasn’t sure that she really qualified for these types of missions unless someone got hurt and needed medical attention. The major upside of it, though, was that it gave her something to think about besides Gabe.

  Hudson once again took over the briefing, pulling up a map on one of the large screens. “These gangs are loosely associated with either the San Bernardino or the San Fernando Valley conclaves, or at least they should be according to where their clubhouses are located. From what we can tell, neither conclave really claims them under their jurisdiction. My guess is that’s because they’re causing so much trouble. What we need to do is get in there and see what’s actually going on.”

  Garrison nodded. “Ideally, we’d wait until we have a chance to make sure you all have the telepathic link that lets you communicate with each other in shifter form. Hudson has some excellent comm devices, and he can go over those in detail with you later, but as I mentioned earlier, the moon isn’t in the right phase. That means the initial part of the mission may be a little more dangerous than it would be otherwise.”

  Emersyn let out a long breath at the mention of that telepathic link again. It was something she hadn’t anticipated. Even if she had known, she wouldn’t have thought it was an issue because she never imagined that Gabe would’ve been part of the Force. But they were both there, and the rest of the members would soon enough be inside their heads. She cleared her throat.

  The dragon raised an eyebrow. “Are you concerned about the safety of this procedure, Doctor?”

  “No.” She hadn’t known Garrison for very long, but he was an easy man to trust. “I just thought I should mention that Gabe and I have already experienced that link.”

  The conference room fell silent. Even Leona stared at her, stunned by the revelation.

  Hudson cleared his throat. “Well, the two of you certainly aren’t from the same clan…”

  Emersyn made a point not to look at Gabe. “No. We met before, in the service.” There was so much more to that story. They weren’t just good friends, and they weren’t even two soldiers who happened to have a fling. It was so much more than that, but this wasn’t the time or the place to go into it.

  The D.C. members glanced at each other, and Garrison tapped his finger on the table. “I didn’t realize that the two of you were… ahem. Anyway, we started out having a strict rule that Force members couldn’t be involved with each other that way. That went out the window with Hudson and Leona, of course, so our concern right now would be that it doesn’t become a problem.”

  She could feel Gabe’s glare on her skin, but she kept he
r focus at the head of the table. “It won’t be,” she assured them. “It’s been a long time, and I don’t even know for sure that it’s still there.”

  “I see.”

  Leona leaned forward, resting her elbows on the table. “I don’t know how the two of you feel about this, but perhaps this would be a good time to test it. The first part of the plan is to send someone out to speak to each conclave. We don’t need everyone to go, but if there’s a chance the two of you still have the link, then it’s a bit of a backup in case things go sideways.”

  There was no avoiding it now. Emersyn turned her head and met Gabe’s stare head-on. He was hard as stone. Even in their human forms, when they shouldn’t have been able to communicate with each other any more than anyone else, she could read his feelings. He was furious. Embarrassed, maybe. But he was still the same soldier she’d always known, and he was willing to do this. It was for the good of the shifter community, and no squabble between them was going to stop him from doing his duty. “That would be fine,” she said.

  “Good. That’s settled. We’ll get you all the information. Now let’s go over a few other things, just basic protocol for the way we do things in the Force,” Hudson continued.

  Emersyn sat quietly through the rest of the meeting. She wanted the distraction of work, but it was impossible with Gabe in the same room. Already she was regretting agreeing to be his partner on this mission.

  When the D.C. member dismissed them, Gabe caught her in the hallway. “How could you do that?” he growled.

  She flicked her silky hair over her shoulder, keeping her eyes straight ahead. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of showing him that he’d gotten to her. “Do what?”

  “Tell them all about… us. That’s personal.”